Musings of a Not Very Cool Gay...

It’s time I came out… Not as gay, I’ll have been out and proud for ten years in October (I’m throwing myself a party!) No, I’m coming out as a NVCG…

I prefer pubbing, to clubbing and I can’t stand pretention,

Thank God for Manchester Pride, It’s good for relieving my tension,

I haven’t had that many “encounters” at Manchester Pride,

If I’ve ever said that it’s more than a few, well I’m sorry but I lied,

You’ll find me at Climax looking mildly out of place,

because I haven’t got the right hair, and certainly not the right face.

My haunt is actually the Women’s Stage with Heather Peace and Horse,

I like to watch the drag kings and Clare Mooney of course.

I find I’m surrounded by couples, often young and very cool,

but I’m a bit of a geek and I can’t even play pool.  

But Manchester Pride is welcoming of cool and geek alike,

whether you drive a BMW or ride a Chopper Bike.

Whether your tee-shirt says “Bench” or “Property of Manchester Met”,

you’re guaranteed a weekend, you will not soon forget.

You can party in the New Union, (I’m back at the hotel by twelve.)

Girls never want to leave so early, they’ll stay and dance by themselves.

My very first Pride in 2003 I was insecure about myself.

I was only nineteen years old but I felt I’d been left on the shelf.

I tried to act all cool, but I didn’t have designer sunspecs

I always wore the wrong shoes, no wonder I never got any sex,

We drank in Sackville Gardens, but something was amiss.

I got so drunk and merry that I couldn’t even score a kiss.

My second Pride was interesting, with one embarrassing hiccup.

My best friend is sworn to secrecy about this particular pick up.

Skip forward a few years to 2010, I vowed to just be me.

I embraced my random geekdom for everyone to see.

I still had no designer clothes, I didn’t get my hair done,

I spent the weekend dressed as a man and I had fantastic fun.

Another Big Weekend, is just a few months away

And remember, even if you’re a Not Very Cool Gay

You can dance til you drop, having fun’s no crime,

We’ll all get together for another gay old time