X-Factor

I felt compelled to pen a response to tonight's X-Factor. 


The behaviour of Tulisa tonight on X-Factor, when she almost reduced a young contestant to tears was disgusting and should not be tolerated. I found it absolutely outrageous that Tulisa in particular had the candour to call Misha B out for bitching behind the scenes. Regardless of what was said to one of her acts, NOBODY deserves to be shouted down, live on stage, in front of MILLIONS of people. It was nothing short of bullying, and really makes me question why she is a "mentor". My heart really went out to Misha and I hope that she knows she won't lose my vote. 


Speaking of bitching, bullying and general nastiness, the aforementioned judge was engaged in her own very public war of words less than a year ago with a dancer. Isn't it a little hypocritical for her to tell Misha not to say nasty things to her poor little groups when she was quoted in The Sun as Tweeting the following;


"WTF do u do? Other then open ur legs? Ur nothin 2 me, I don't speak about u, I don't think about u, u don't even exist! Get on with ur life, ur obsession is unhealthy and ur just makin things worse 4 urself, take a leaf out of my book, love live life B****." 


Other than the over 25s, the majority of finalists have not yet left their teens. Janet Devlin is 16 and Misha is 19. They are kids! They should be protected. But instead we have an 18 year old Frankie Cocozza applauded for sleeping around, acting uninterested in this opportunity of a lifetime, and this week "swaggering" onto the stage half way through his song following a full week of nights out. Gary said "He's a teenager!" No excuse. And then back to Misha. Yes, maybe she takes her enthusiasm and passion off stage. Maybe she even antagonises the other acts. Perhaps she does this to spook her competition - I don't know and that's the point, nobody knows. I've yet to see evidence or video of this altercation, and frankly, I'm not interested in seeing it anyway. Because here's the dirty little secret. Every artist, performer, musician with any passion (even some without) has slagged off a rival, has had something taken out of context and published which shows them in a less than favourable light, or has had a private moment broadcast for all the world to see. So, what now? If a head teacher singled out one student and made that comment in front of a hall of kids in assembly, I can guarantee that they would be swiftly suspended and investigated, and rightly so! So come on OFCOM, ITV or Executive Directors of X Factor - reprimands for Tulisa. 


It's a shame too, I was really beginning to like her.

A Proud Mancunian

A little bit more positive, my pal Emma Garside, currently residing in Gorse Hill, Manchester - the proudest mancunian you'll ever meet penned this poem which just about says it all and has very kindly let me post it...


I am Manchester by Emma Garside

I am Manchester,

I am the friendliest people on earth,

I am red and blue,

I am afflecks and corn exchange memories of old,

I am the triangle and printworks of new,

I am the Arndale shops and market,

I am piccadilly gardens,

I am the northern quarter,

I am still going strong no matter what you throw at me,

I am manchester full of pride,

I am manchester gay straight and bi,

I am the mancs coming together,

I am cleaning up the riots no matter the weather.

I am manchester through and through.

Manchester i'm so proud of you!

Out of the fear comes greatness... Please share this!

PAIN...

I'm afraid this is rather a negative one... I've had a really bad day.


I returned to work on Tuesday... 


It was a necessity...


I was about to go onto SSP (Statuatory Sick Pay) which is £81.60/week ($132.00, €93)...


This isn't a bad rate for somebody who isn't physically working, and a darn sight more than employment and support allowance (a sickness benefit which replaced Incapacity Benefit), but I cannot physically live on that. This is not because I have become accustomed to living to certain standards, but because I live to a budget for my outgoings and if I drop £500.00+ per month I will be verging on bankruptcy...


So I have returned to work...


And I am in agony.


My employers who I will not name have been very helpful in terms of my return to work. They have furnished me with a raised desk and a stool so I can alternate between standing and sitting... But as it turns out, they both hurt...


I cried today - luckily my new desk faces the wall so nobody knew... 


I took two doses of the Tramadol/Diclofenac/Cyclozine mix which has been up til now taking the edge off the pain, plus two Paracetamol tablets between my two doses of opiates... They didn't touch it. I spent the day feeling like I was being battered with big sticks across my spine. The pain is constant, then come spasms in bursts which take my breath away. I'm trying to keep my owie noises under wraps and desperately trying not to be a whiner at work - when someone asks if I'm ok, through gritted teeth I say "Yes".


What am I supposed to do?


I just have to grin and bear it... 






I finished at 4pm

Fuck... I'm still horizontal!

A few days on from my last entry, and I am still on the sofa, horizontal and feeling not too pretty! Yesterday was productive. I showered, changed my pyjamas and updated the website which has needed doing for a few days.

Today too has been mildly productive, I walked to the Post Office and bought myself a few magazines, emailed my Aunt about my birthday and now I'm watching Victorian Farm on Yesterday (which should be renamed "The Nazi's Were Bad - We Get It"), whilst writing another entry.

In brief, I went to A&E (that's ER to any of my American readers!) and Jimi, the lovely nigerian doctor prescribed me Diazepam and Diclofenac. I had intended to continue from my previous entry with a hilarious account of the visit, but I've just felt too poorly unfortunately - what I will say is that there's nothing funnier than hearing a doctor in the next cubicle saying "Hello, my name's Gary", in a thick Oriental accent followed by your partner whispering immediately "sure it is" in response. Laughed heartily and had to sit down again!

Following my trip to A&E last Tuesday, I ended up there again on Monday of this week after collapsing on the floor on Sunday, rather upsettingly, as I had honestly thought I'd be back at work the following day. After a terrible night's sleep and a few tears and my last Diazepam, I called NHS Direct who suggested calling an ambulance! Well, not one to waste resources (even if I am paying for them through the PAYE system) and delirious with pain, I stayed in bed thinking - "Well, it's not an emergency!" Very luckily for me, a very good friend in the shape of Pixie Truffle offered me a lift to the hospital and Nickie turned up just as we were leaving so I had my own personal entourage when I returned to A&E.

Sadly, I wasn't treated by the attractive female doctor who I kept straining my neck to see everytime she walked past (Nickie knows about this and we had quite a giggle about it). The very nice doctor who was assigned to me did the same batch of tests as lovely Jimi had the previous week, and one more which I will not go into detail about, but was designed to check whether I had damaged my Coccyx (I hadn't). The pain by this point was worse than it was the previous week and it would seem that I had jarred it when I fell on the floor. The doctor advised that he wasn't concerned enough to keep me in (a relief), but he could see that I was in a significant amount of pain and so prescribed me some stronger painkillers. He asked me about Codeine, but me and that particular drug have a chequered past - we don't get on. It affects my digestive transit shall we say (TMI?) So instead, he prescribed me Tramadol, a fairly strong Opiate which has finally stopped the pain in its tracks but comes with a bunch of really pleasant side effects like extreme nausea, dizziness, clumsiness and what can only be described as the appearance of being stoned! My doctor has prescribed Cyclizine to deal with the nausea, but can't really do much due to the dizziness. Honestly, the walk to the shops was a triumph!

I'm bored as hell, and very lonesome and tomorrow, instead of being at work or at Oldham Pride, I'll be right here, on the sofa, watching repeats on the TV and wishing I could get ahold of a box set of Prisoner to pass the time. Until I do, it's Gilmore Girls, Desperate Housewives and Being Erica on E4... and Learn From My Fail blog and Facebook Online. Please send me Facebook Messages, entertain me with videos... ANYTHING as I'm climbing the walls!

In other news I found an app which tells me when to take each of my tablets which is useful and will help me avoid the inevitable overdose which comes from Tramadol induced forgetfulness!

Signing Off xx

Fuck... The Ceiling's Gone All Swirly!

Inspired by my old pal with whom I've recently been reacquainted, what follows is my analgesic review... Firstly, in the words of "Scrubs", my favourite hospital based comedy, "it's pronounced an-algesic, not anal-gesic, the pills go in your mouth"... You can generally distinguish between oral medication and suppositories because of the size of the pills, generally, if they are bigger than 2 joints of your little finger, they ain't for swallowing! :-)

My first medication, self-prescribed, was paramol (not to be confused with the awesome post-millennial, Tennessee rock band Paramore although probably equally hard to swallow!) these contain paracetamol and dihydrocodeine and tend to make you feel a little floopy... The did not get rid of the pain, however they did stop me giving a fuck about the pain so something of a result!

The next day I forgot to take them to work and could only get paracetamol before my 8am shift started which was as effective as covering to area in dripping and chanting! Thus began my three pronged attack. Back at Boots, I asked for something strong with which I could take paracetamol... The gave me ibrupofen with dihydrocodeine! Once again the pain remained but I was so "hopped up on goofballs" that I couldn't do my work, and that coupled with the pain sent me home.

At this point I believed my back pain to be nothing more than the residuals from an old hockey injury (wow, never sounded gayer, or more middle-class!!) so I bought myself a heat pack and some mags and went home to rest up vowing that a few back exercises would have me back in work the next day!

The next day following badly thought out back stretches designed for sprains and pulls, my back was in agony so I took myself down to the walk in centre in Manchester. After a brief wait I saw a nurse who basically said I was doing all the right things (how wrong she was).

I spent the rest of the afternoon hobbling between bed, bathroom and sofa and drinking lots of coffee with the pain getting increasingly sharp and stabby and beginning to radiate down my legs with tingling in my toes. A quick look online showed that anything from nerve damage to a slipped bloody disc could be causing the pain and as Nickie wasn't around to be the voice of reason, I began to panic!

Tbc

Why You Should Volunteer

Yawn… Today is a long day, I’m not really feeling the late shift. Late isn’t all that late here, just 11:00-19:00, but it’s enough. Once I’m home and fed, it’s 9 and I’m wondering what has happened to my homelife with my missus.  Maybe I should use this whole “right to a private family life” defence to get rid of my late shifts, I mean, no, I have no children, but I do have a family. I am disgustingly happy at the moment, positively gleeful over my current situation, even if it is slowly killing me!


I work 37 hours per week for an unnamed supermarket, in their offices, not on the shop floor. I don’t say that because there’s anything wrong with working on the shop floor. I only mention it because the work I do is fairly far removed from your everyday till girl. It’s all computer based which makes my eyes square, and my arse massive. I don’t mind my job, it pays my bills, very well.


Outside my ordinary job, I work three voluntary roles. I always thought volunteering meant shaking a bucket, “chugging” or going door to door, but in the past three years I’ve discovered that you can use volunteering to better your CV, gain experience and have tonnes of fun.


1)     I have a weekly radio show on a community station called “Gaydio”. It is the first of its kind, dedicated to the Gay community in Manchester and also around the world. We get listeners from as far afield as Gran Canaria and America. My show is the MOBO show (The Groove) on Tuesdays, 9PM -11PM GMT and can be heard outside Manchester online at www.gaydio.co.uk. Although it is the Music of Black Origin show, that really just relates to the music and my chat can be about anything – usually stuff I read in the paper that amuses me.


2)     I’m an adhoc volunteer for Manchester Pride, the UK’s biggest LGBT festival (more info at www.manchesterpride.com) I would love to volunteer regularly and work in the office, but due to my main job, this is impossible so instead I organise events and promote Manchester Pride through my online community and on my radio show. Last year I led the Pride Parade through Manchester as my Drag King alter ego, and came 2nd in the HRH Drag King competition, and this year, I am organising the competition and helping to host. I’m also performing on the community stage on Saturday 27th August at 10pm. I’m going to be incredibly busy, but it should be a great weekend, as always. A few other bits about Pride this year, if you didn’t already know, it is Manchester Pride’s 21st birthday, and in honour of this historic birthday, the Lowry in conjunction with Manchester Pride has an exhibition with memorabilia, photos and videos from the past 21 years as well as event information for 2011. I’m a real nostalgic type and so I got a real thrill from watching the “It’s a Knockout” video from 1991 and from all the flyers, programmes and posters they have in the glass cases. On that note, if you have any memorabilia you’d like to donate, contact Lance at info@manchesterpride.com, or the Lowry.


3)     My most recent venture is a position on the board of the Lesbian Community Project in Manchester. We are the only full time organisation for Lesbian, Bisexual, Trans-Women and Trans-Men in the UK. We have been running for 15 years, and I’m trying desperately to catch up with all that history. Until I worked with the LCP for a fantastic event back in February (Grrrl Meets Boi), I’ll admit, I’d never really used the LCP, mostly because I was living outside Manchester, but it has been a terrific resource since I moved first to Salford, then to Cheetham Hill. Apart from excellent events and fundraisers, the LCP offers support and help to anyone calling, emailing or dropping in. Tonight is SOFA (Support or Fun Activities) and we’re planning new groups all the time.  The new board which met for the first time in May has wasted no time in planning for the coming financial year, and we intend to make the LCP great again, as well as recruiting as many new members as we can! (for more info or to receive an LCP Newsletter by email contact enquiries@lesbiancommunityproject.co.uk) This my newest voluntary role has already led me to a Slutwalk (http://menmedia.co.uk/manchestereveningnews/news/s/1423405_hundreds-join-slut-walk-protest-through-manchester - That’s me in the pink scarf!) and to a rather special club which shall remain nameless! ;-)


In short, I love my life, I’m doing activities which are efficacious  to the community. I have the perfect girlfriend and a lovely home life and to top it all off, I’m packing my CV with experience which will help me move onto the next step! Volunteering doesn’t need to be a drag, it doesn’t need to take up all of your time  and it doesn’t necessarily have to be a hard slog. For example… why not volunteer at Manchester Pride this summer? It’s fun and you get to see some fab performers, plus there’s a wicked free Volunteer’s party at the end. Contact info@manchesterpride.com or go to the website for more information!

MiPhone

Woohoo!! I am blogging from my new iPhone I am massively excited! It's been a really long week and I'm knackered, finally finished the LCP (Lesbian Community Project) newsletter. Epic fail today as I accidentally PDF'd the wrong file and sent it to the printer...


Luckily a guy from work with a PDF converter did the right one for me and the proof will be ready tomorrow! Phew. Full run should be ready Friday!


But for now, Angry Boys on BBC3 and bed. By the way, how annoying is it when the diarrhoea ad comes on when your eating tea?!? :-)